What do you do to hold onto the memory of your baby who has died?

There are many things a parent can do to honor their baby who has died. No matter the cause- miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, health issues, or otherwise- the impact this tiny person has on your heart and on your life will stay with you forever. There is no %26quot;getting over%26quot; the death of your child.





As bereaved parents many of us do specific things to honor our children%26#039;s memory: planting a tree or flowers, donating momentos to your local hospital for newly bereaved parents, donating books for your library on grief and loss, or even voluteering your time at a local children%26#039;s shelter...





There is no %26quot;guide book%26quot; to follow after you lose a much wanted and very loved baby, there are no %26quot;rules%26quot; for grief- no right or wrong in how you honor the child who has passed away.





Please share with us your thoughts and ideas- you may be able to help a parent who has had their heart broken and dreams shattered by this devastating loss.





What do you do to honor your baby who has died?

What do you do to hold onto the memory of your baby who has died?
I have a special shelf with my baby girl%26#039;s picture, a few little stuffed animals that were to be hers, the prayer card and crosses from her funeral, other little trinkets, and a pink birthday candle that my son and I light then blow out (after we tell her %26quot;Happy Birthday%26quot;) every year on the day of her birth/death day.


Since my daughter was born with severe birth defects, I have made a few small donations to the March of Dimes. I also wear a March of Dimes Saving Babies wristband.


I have a tattoo on my back of her name in a heart.


I added her name to a few online baby memorial walls.


I don%26#039;t live in the state where she is buried, but when I did, I would visit her grave, take flowers, and talk to her.


She is forever in my heart. A parent does not get over losing a child, but you can get through it, by doing whatever it takes.
Reply:My condolences





The lord knoweth the best, he knows better,


When he is the life giver then he also takes away lives for


his kingdom.





My personal experience


I still have his picture in my heart after 8 years,


and at times tears roll down my eyes.


I was there but not strong enough to save his life.





Sincerely hope God will forgive me.
Reply:I had a friend whom after having a daughter born prematurely, (only lived for 2 hours), she had a tattoo put on her shoulder blade with the baby%26#039;s name and birthdate put on it. Tattoos are forever.





Also have another friend who started a charity trust fund in their late childs name.
Reply:i kept mines in my heart
Reply:I had two miscarriages and was having a very difficult time dealing with them. My husband had a %26quot;Mother%26#039;s Ring%26quot; made for me with a stone for each baby that I lost.
Reply:My husband died 5 years ago this month and these are the ways I deal with this.


I remind myself everyone has challenges to face in life no one is exempt.





Thank the lord every day for all the good things in your life.


The time you had with your child me with my husband.


The 4 wonderful children he left as his legacy.


The in-laws.


I thank the lord for hot showers.


Chocolate


Cola


Imitrex for my migraines


All of my family members even if they have had to distance themselves from me because they suffer anew each time they see or talk to me.





I suffer still but I spend the majority of my day living. Still attempting to make a new life for me and remaining family.
Reply:My Best Friend had a still birth when she was 6 months pregnant. It was extremely sad.. he weighed only 8oz when he was born but he was perfect.. tiny toes, nose, ears everything was perfectly formed.





The hospital gave her a tiny hat %26amp; they put his litle footprints on a card. They have his ashes are in a beautiful box in their room.





Her husband also bought her a sterling silver charm braclet with his name on a heart. Now that she has a daughter (who just turned one) she also has her daughters name on another charm on the braclet.
Reply:When my brother died it seemed like everyone was in so much pain, but after a couple of years passed we planted a tree in our backyard and my grandma asked us one thing that we remembered about him, our favorite and she made these cement blocks with stained glass pictures of the stuff, like my moms was a sun and mine was these cups that he used to play with all the time, etc. We also look at pictures and tell stories about all the things remember about him. As time passes it is not as hard to talk about him, instead now we remember the good times.
Reply:I got a memorial tattoo. I have the most beautiful victorian angel on my right shoulder with my daughter%26#039;s birthday and the day that she was blessed into heaven on a banner underneath that simply says %26quot;In God%26#039;s Hands%26quot;.
Reply:Tomorrow will be the one year anniversary of the loss of our baby boy. We plan to get matching tattoos on Saturday in memory of him. We%26#039;re also making a sort of %26quot;scrap-book page in a frame%26quot; of his ultrasound picture, the pregnancy test, hospital bands and such to hang on the wall. We planted wild strawberry plants in our garden to honor his memory because we called him Strawberry during my pregnancy. In a community sense we gave all of the baby clothes and blankets we had purchased for him to a single mom who needed things for her baby. Losing our child also inspired me to work harder towards fulfilling my dream to become a doula and childbirth educator.



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